Tuesday, April 20, 2004

 
Today: Outlook Sunny.

I'm really beginning to see how much the atmosphere affects me. Last week things were almost exactly the same as this week, but the weather was crappy--I felt TERRIBLE about EVERYTHING. Now the weather is beautiful, my life is exactly the same and I feel like I'm on top of the world. I guess there's really a lot to be said for seasonal affective disorder. Glad it's sunny. Glad i'm happy. Glad, glad, glad.

Let's hope the rain later this week doesn't kill this happiness I've got goin' on.


Thursday, April 15, 2004

 
Today: Having too much to do.

I work in a pretty fun office most of the time, but i find that I'm always saving the company's ass. It kind of sucks. I'm 'enormously helpful' but somehow they don't find that I'm helpful enough to pay me well or take me with them to Atlanta to finish everything or to give me benefits--even though I know they all make tons and tons of money and this is a big corporation which could certainly stand to have a good employee like me full-time. I'm told that this is common. Why?

Sigh. I also have an essay to finish today or I'll never be a teen model.

OH! And by the way, if you want to read a whole bunch of writing I did over the last two years (some of which is really pretty stupid, but other parts are great) you should go to this page here!

Wednesday, April 14, 2004

 
I'm so tired today.

I want to write something good, but I have to find something to write about. This morning I was all miffed about the radio, but like so many bad dreams, as soon as I got to work, the memory of what it was that got me hyped up seemed to subside.

I've been working my ass off here at work and at the 2 shows I'm doing. I spent the first day I've had off since January walking around in the rain in Brooklyn and I need a manicure something horrible.

That's right, I'm a fag and I don't care. I want to go home, curl up in my Bill Blass sheets and rock myself until I'm in my much deserved coma.

Tuesday, April 13, 2004

 
Today's Blog is about Blogs and opinions and the internet.

Why do we have them? It's a very interesting day when people can pre-publish their opinions as if they matter. I mean, I'm not against the idea; I just started my own Blog--goodness knows I'm one to jump on e-bandwagons. I just wonder where this bandwagon is headed.

People have long held opinion pages on the internet, but is it serving any purpose--and if it is, is it serving society, or just our ego-driven consumer selves? Blah, I don't know, and further don't know what I'm complaining about: I work at a huge multi-national publishing corporation, sitting on an aeron chair and drinking free hot-cocoa all day. I just wonder if we're all going to post our opinions, doesn't that kind of flood the market of the internet with a lot of potentially misinformed and uneducated opinions?

I suppose newsgroups and billboards have been open places for opinions and gossip since the beginning of the internet boom, but blogs are different, aren't they? They seem to carry a heavier tone. Famous people, artists, musicians, even some politicians have their diaries, notes and ideas on blogs, as well as grad students, college students, political analysts and even anarchist high-schoolers. The free-speech possibilities are endless.

But therein lies the possible problem, as well. (Insert Melodramatic pause with foreboding musical interlude) There are some opinions that though legally protected are perhaps not so great to have in such an easily attainable medium as the internet. I'm not just talking about pornography or the boy-love organization. Those are typical sorts of things that parents know to look out for. There are of course the websites devoted to drug use, bigotry and anti-government violence, but those have monitors from the powers that be--I'm personally not worried about the Anarchist's Cookbook being on the web, maybe I should be, but I'm not.

What I'm really worried about is sites like the one I heard about devoted to Cutters. (insert another dramatic pause and musical break) Cutters, from what I'm told are girls who cut themselves intentionally to release the stress of their lives. I'm told that it's a rather common thing and that even some girls with seemingly normal psychologies engage in this activity. The site, which I don't have the URL posted for, for fear of spreading it around, but I know it WAS out there rather recently. Of course, this isn't a blog site, but there are postings glorifying the feeling one gets from self-injury, and that scares me. I have a younger sister who has on occasion been depressed and I would be terrified to learn that she ever participated in this kind of activity. It even bothers me the fact that she could even read that it felt good--like the rest of us, teenagers are impressionable.

I dunno. I'm kind of back and forth about the internet. It's a great tool, but it opens itself wide open for all kinds of misuse. The musical Avenue Q has a song called 'The Internet is for Porn' and they're right, certainly, but that's the least of societies worries--or at least should be. I recently heard of a bill board that said something to the effect of 'for valentines day, give your wife this gift: Stop looking at porn on the internet.'

Now, to those of us who aren't too religious and under 30, that's pretty freaking hilarious, but I suppose to some it's worth putting on a bill-board--And that makes sense! The jobless rate, climbing taxes for the middle class, the slashing of veterans' benefits and the growing uninsured population in this country aren't really worth awareness dollars as long as we get those men to stop lookin' at that porn and start looking at their wives. (On a personal and pseudo-political note, it really bugs me that some people think that all of America's problems can be fixed by fixing America's families. It's a two-way street, and I'm sure I'll write about it some time, but it FRIES me that people can be so loudly obtuse)

Of course this can't be my final word on this, and it's certainly not THE final word--who the hell am I anyway? But, what I hope is that I read this a few weeks from now and have some more questions. I like those more than answers most of the time. Do you?

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